A Long Awaited Embrace (ch41)
Chapter 41 MacMurough/De Clare
As Gilbert sat up quickly at the sight of the man in the doorway, he felt a strange feeling come over him. He wasn’t sure what to feel, whether he should be bitter or pleased about this surprise first meeting with his natural father. Initially he thought he would have time to prepare and that his mother would be there to do most of the talking. He was on his own now and he had to think of what to do next. He slid off the bed slowly, noticing the emotional look on his father’s face.
Strongbow was nervous as he stood by the door waiting for Gilbert to come towards him. He had often thought of this moment, especially in the last few months. Even then he didn’t know how he would feel if he ever got this chance. He could only choke back the lump in his throat as he stared at the boy who looked so much like himself. His first reaction was to hug him tightly but thought it may intimidate him. He wasn’t sure at this point exactly how Gilbert felt about him and didn’t want to feel more rejection, an emotion he was so used to feeling lately.
Gilbert walked to him and decided to formally address his father as the king. He could think of no other way and he only had seconds to contemplate the situation. When he was standing in front of his father he bowed his head as he had been taught to do. Strongbow felt uncomfortable as he watched his son being so proper. Without thinking Strongbow reached down and took hold of Gilbert in a long awaited embrace.
Gilbert was stunned but also overwhelmed by his own emotions. He had never imagined his father ever even thinking about him let alone actually regretting his absence. This is not how he pictured their first meeting but was enjoying the heartfelt affection, something he had never experienced from a male figure.
When Strongbow loosened his grip and backed slightly away, he gazed at Gilbert with his eyes glistening, hoping to see a look of joy rather than shock. He was pleased to see Gilbert looking happy. With his voice trembling slightly he spoke for the first time.
“Gilbert, it is so good to finally meet you. I have always thought about you.” Strongbow said as he sat down carefully on the bench, motioning to Gilbert to join him. “How have you been?”
“I am fine sir. How are you? You’re injury I mean.” Gilbert asked, not knowing quite what to say yet.
“I am better, for a while there they weren’t sure what was going to happen. Which was a blessing in a way because you are here now because of it. I am having trouble walking, but when I was told you were here I knew I had to come even if they had to carry me.” He replied with a chuckle. “How do you feel about being here? They didn’t really give you a choice in the matter.”
“I was scared at first, but now I am happy to be here. I traveled here by boat which was exciting. My new chamber is amazing.” He said as he smiled looking around. “I would like to know something sir, were you the one who arranged my reading lessons years ago?”
“I did. You need to know how to read in this world, and I wanted to make sure it was something you would always have.” He said seriously, and then realized he needed to explain the details behind his absence, his son deserved at least that. “I want you to know that I was young when everything happened…with your mother. I had a father who was quite stubborn. He required everything to be just as it should be according to him. He wanted me to marry someone of his choosing, preferably someone from a noble family like ours. I never married back then, for reasons I am not so sure of. That isn’t to say that I am blameless. I was too young to realize what I should have done. Then as the years went on I guess I couldn’t face it. I am sorry Gilbert. I tried to make things easier for you and your mother, but I don’t think it was hardly enough.”
Gilbert didn’t know how to respond to what he had said, he never felt like he missed out on anything. His mother had made sure he had everything he needed, maybe even more than the other families, so he usually felt grateful for what he had. He decided to ask a question he had been thinking about all day since his arrival.
“Now that you are better, does that mean we will be going back to our village, now that I am not really needed?” Gilbert asked plainly, not sure what he wanted to hear.
“That is up to you and your mother. If you don’t want to be here then I cannot make you stay. However, I want you to know that I would like you to be here. Ever since my brother told me that you had arrived, I have been feeling very happy, and I haven’t been happy in a long time.” Strongbow admitted to Gilbert who was looking somewhat confused.
Gilbert looked surprised and said, “How can you not be happy sir? You are a King, what can be better than that?”
“To be honest, I have only been the king for a short while, and the last year or so hasn’t been so wonderful for reasons I’ll tell you about some other time.” He answered as he looked down. “So, should we go meet your mother? I haven’t seen her in many years, I am anxious to see her again.”
Gilbert stood up and walked toward the door. “I believe she is in the next chamber, I’ll get her so that you don’t have to move your leg too much.”
As Gilbert walked out of the room, Strongbow took a cleansing deep breath. He was relieved that it had gone so well with his son, and thankful that it seemed like he may have a chance of keeping him here. He knew he had much more to do in order to make things right, if that was possible. His stomach grew nervous at the thought of seeing Isabel again. He wondered if he would get such a warm response and immediately doubted it. It had been seventeen long years that she had to raise Gilbert alone, she never married either so he knew the work raising a growing boy must have been tiresome. He could only hope for a cordial reception.
A few moments later after he had rehearsed what he would say, Gilbert walked back in holding Isabel’s hand as he guided her. When she walked through the door Strongbow felt like he had gone back in time seventeen years.
She had barely aged and looked as stunning as she did back then. He immediately stood up with the help of the arm of the bench and smiled at her, hoping she would smile back. He took a breath and began to say what he had planned, only the words didn’t sound like the ones he rehearsed.
“Isabel…you look as beautiful as you did all those years ago!” I mean…thank you for bringing Gilbert here, I appreciate you…coming here…for me.” He said stumbling on his words, feeling somewhat foolish.
“Thank you your highness for your hospitality. We are happy to be here.” She said with a smile, laughing inside at his bungled words. “I should say you look the same as well.”
“Forgive me, I guess I am just amazed that you are both here. I really do thank you for coming all this way.” Strongbow said sincerely as he invited her to sit.
Isabel had to some extent forgotten what Strongbow looked like when they were younger, but seeing him again put a face to the memories.
On the voyage to Leinster she spent many hours thinking back to the days when they were together. They knew back then that the relationship was forbidden but Strongbow insisted that he would stay with her. Isabel was so enamored by his looks, his charm and perhaps his title, that she believed him. Her world fell apart when she was told that he would no longer be in her life. With the help of her family and Strongbow’s money, she raised Gilbert and made him the focus of her life.
Upon seeing Strongbow Isabel felt something she couldn’t explain. She wasn’t sure if it was reminiscence of their days together, or a hurt that had never healed. She enjoyed those initial moments, especially how it made her feel when she saw that he was obviously nervous upon seeing her. As she sat with him she felt a comfort she hadn’t expected.
on July 25, 2007 at 10:07 pm
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On July 26, 2007 at 12:59 am goldenvalley Said: |Edit This Ahhh, I am glad Gilbert is making Strongbow happy, he has had such a hard time and I am glad he is getting better I thought he was a goner for a bit. I wonder what will happen between him and Isabel?
Aoife’s goodbye (ch42)
Chapter 42 de Clare/MacMurrough
Gilbert and Isabel’s first supper in the castle went surprisingly well. When everyone sat down you could feel the tension in the room. Strongbow was able to attend even though his leg was still painfully sore. With the help of a strong guard he was able to move about the castle quite well. After so much activity his leg was throbbing with pain, he simply ignored it and focused on Gilbert and Isabel.
Aoife, William and Edward were also in attendance, but Strongbow’s attention was directed at Isabel. He had spent the day with her and Gilbert, getting to know them and talking about their lives. The last few hours were spent sitting in the garden with Gilbert alone, talking about all he had missed through the years. As he sat at the table gazing at them both he felt extremely joyful.
Isabel hadn’t changed much, aside from more self confidence she still had an incredible wit and had a perpetual positive outlook. This is what attracted her to him when they were young. She was from a very poor family but still had a great sense of self and determination. She never allowed herself to feel inferior to Richard even though his family owned all of the land. He snapped out of his reflection and realized he couldn’t keep from talking to her even though he was probably being rude to everyone else.
Aoife felt him ignoring her and began to feel a strange emotion she couldn’t identify. She had been sitting right next to him for an hour and he hadn’t looked her way more than once. She was used to being the focus of his attention even if it wasn’t always desired, which is why she couldn’t understand why she was feeling this way. Could it be jealousy, she thought. How could she be jealous if she loved Finn and couldn’t wait to be his wife now that the annulment was granted? She even felt herself start to anger as she thought back to all of the hours she had spent at his bedside out of obligation, and hours she could have spent with Finn and their newborn baby Lorcan. All of those long days and nights worrying were not even appreciated enough for even a few moments of his time.
As the evening progressed she began to notice the manor in which Strongbow was looking at Isabel. She recognized the gaze and knew at once that he must be attracted to her. Again, Aoife felt resentful. She knew at that moment that it was time to leave the castle and move in with her mother with baby Lorcan. The last week had been too difficult for her, the intense guilt she had experienced had taken a toll on her fragile state of mind. She was feeling unsure and confused, along with unfounded feelings of jealousy that she couldn’t admit to. She decided she would leave the following morning. She was sure William, Strongbow’s brother, would be happy to see her go especially after the fight that had occurred between them. She even felt that perhaps Strongbow wouldn’t mind either now that he had a new object of affection.
Isabel had noticed that Princess Aoife was out of sorts. She didn’t know her but she could tell something wasn’t right. She continued to enjoy herself and decided to ask Strongbow after supper about the situation. She felt comfortable asking since he had made it a point to create a relaxed environment for her and Gilbert. He had briefly mentioned her in conversation earlier but gave no details and changed the subject. She thought it odd that the Princess would be living in the King’s castle without any blood relation, and she knew she wasn’t involved with William for they barely spoke during the meal. She was very curious and determined to find out. Immediately following dinner, Strongbow was helped into the main hall and was seated on a bench to rest. Aoife appeared suddenly and began to talk of her plans to leave.
“Hello Aoife. How are you?” He asked her from a seated position as she stood over him. “What did you think of Isabel and Gilbert? Aren’t they wonderful? I am so blessed to have my son with me now.”
“Yes Richard. They both seem very nice. I am happy for you. However, I do need to talk with you.” She said as she quickly changed the subject not wanting to spend any more time talking about Isabel. “About what? Is there a problem?” He asked as he furrowed his brow. “No not a problem. I have just decided that we will be leaving the castle to move in with with my mother.” She explained waiting for his response.
After a moment of thought he replied, “Well, I suppose I knew that would be the next step.”
Finding herself feeling annoyed that he didn’t disagree or even sound disappointed, she took a second to calmly explain her reasons even though it was apparent that they weren’t needed. “You are better now and you don’t really need me here to help you any longer, so I thought it might be good if I left to give you time with Gilbert.”
He then recalled all of the time she had spent with him when he was sick and felt that he should thank her. He had been so sidetracked that it slipped his mind. “Aoife, you know how grateful I am to have had you by my side. I can’t thank you enough. You are largely responsible for saving my life.” He said sincerely.
She felt slightly better now that he was back to displaying a kindly manner towards her. “I hardly think I helped save your life. I think the doctors and God had more to do with it than I.” She said bashfully. “When will you be leaving?” He asked quickly.
“I am having my belongings packed as we speak. Lorcan and I will be gone by morning.” She said as she looked away. His kindness was short lived and she was feeling hurt by his disinterest, although for the life of her she couldn’t understand why.
“I suppose you and Finn will be naming a day to be married?” He asked reluctantly, still feeling a bit of a sting from the thought.
“Oh yes, as soon as we can. It will be small though. I don’t really want to draw much attention to it after everything that has happened.” She explained quickly, not wanting to discuss the details of the past.
“Well I wish you luck and many blessings. I will miss you Aoife.” He said genuinely, still feeling the ache in his heart for her, although it seemed less painful than before.
“Thank you Richard. I am sorry for everything that has happened. I was not good to you and I will always feel guilty about that.” She said with tears welling.
“Lets not talk about it. The less said the better for us both.” He said as she grabbed her hand. “I will always care for you and will be here if you need me.”
With tears in her eyes she backed away slowly. She then saw Isabel coming into the hall, and rushed past her only nodding politely.
When Strongbow saw Isabel his face lit up. He was feeling relieved that he wasn’t experiencing the devastation he thought he would feel the day Aoife would leave for good. He had always imagined this day as an end, but now he had so much to look forward to that it felt like a beginning.
on August 6, 2007 at 1:09 am
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- On August 6, 2007 at 2:19 am Yicke Said: |Edit This Poor Aiofe, she spend a good deal of her life doing other people’s bidding and nobody seems to actually care. I can understand her confusion.I am glad Strongbow has found a new reason for living. I only wonder how his lords will accept a peasant woman as the new queen. Or will she just be his consort?
- On August 7, 2007 at 4:55 am goldenvalley Said: |Edit This Poor Aoife she has had it tough, but as she leaves she starts a new life with Finn and her little baby,she will be fine.Strongbow may have rocky times ahead if like Yicke said he wants Isabel as his wife. I am just glad she is there to take his mind of Aoife. Now he can let her go and start a new life.
